OBAMA TELLS REPUBLICANS TO STOP ‘BEING GAY’

In a not so politically correct blunder, President Obama told House Republicans at a conference last Wednesday to “just stop being gay” about disagreeing with his policies. Republicans, who have been adversaries to Obama’s sweeping health care bill and other liberal policies, have recently been energized with the latest Republican Senate win in Massachusetts. At his wit’s end, Obama told the assembled Republican representatives, “Bottom line, is if you disagree with me, you’re being a petty partisan, so just stop this nonsense. Pass my damn bill, aright?” According to Obama, he has been working too long on this bill to have those “assholes” rile everyone up against him. “I’m not a radical,” Obama continued. “I’m not a fuckin’ socialist, aright? Just stop being gay, guys, and just pass it.” House Republican John Boener, who Obama said, “could some times act like a real douche,” says he does not like the latest line of bullying on behalf of Mr. Obama. In other news, according to the Associate Press, the fact that the Nationals, Washington DC’s baseball team, is the worst team in baseball is symbolic.